I am in the middle of doing my Java programming homework right now and it's hard as a presidential candidate's hairspray job. Yeah, I'm whining but I know I'm not getting any sympathy here, because I'm stuck in the middle in terms of computer skill. People who don't know computers probably would think I'm some kind of god because I can print strings of insults out on the screen. On the other hand, people who actually code Java are laughing at me because I'm struggling with do-while loops. Right now they are thinking of insults that they can print about me. They will probably not use do-while loops. What a bunch of pansies.
But the point of that explanation is to say that I have no idea why my brain feels so tired. What part of the brain is it that wears out? It doesn't have muscle fibers that break down with wear. I don't picture my noodle being like those huge guys that intimidate me while I work out with my 25 pound weights at the gym (not that I'm dwelling on those muscle bound mouth breathers who. . . ooh, please don't hurt me. Ow, please?) I'm hoping the grey matter can't just start to dissolve. (I do have to blow my nose though. I better weigh my head.) So to find out the science behind this phenomenon, I consulted Dr. Imadeanameup.
According to the good doctor, scientists have studied the effects of concentrated effort on the brain, but haven't yet come to any conclusions. Usually this is because they spend most of the time playing the "xerox my butt" prank with the CAT scanners. Scientists are apparently a silly lot. I mean, it's obvious they made this up. I'm a little concerned about those bones. Has anyone seen Elijah Wood lately?
I guess that just goes to show that science doesn't have all the answers and I'm going to have to do the research myself. As soon as these CAT scans print out.
More Poll Numbers
Zzzzzz…
PollingReport.com, as usual.
It's a lot more mixed than its been in the last couple of weeks. And I'm too lazy to copy the numbers over. Click the link, already.
PollingReport.com, as usual.
It's a lot more mixed than its been in the last couple of weeks. And I'm too lazy to copy the numbers over. Click the link, already.
I Am Not Making This Up
Dave Barry taking a year-long sabbatical!
Now what am I going to read on Sunday mornings? Other than Dilbert, I mean.
Now what am I going to read on Sunday mornings? Other than Dilbert, I mean.
When you see this, post a bit of poetry in your blog (and also post this heading, otherwise people will think your blog has become a poetry blog)
Master Matt has commanded so obey I must.
I left college and came home with a box.
All I wanted was to change my socks.
But my mom's loathing
Of washing my clothing
Had led her to change all the locks.
I left college and came home with a box.
All I wanted was to change my socks.
But my mom's loathing
Of washing my clothing
Had led her to change all the locks.
No Headline is Suitable
The Cardinals are in the World Series for the first time since 1987. And I am out of my mind with joy.
We Kept on Fighting 'Til the End
Actually, we just kept on showing up. Yes, it's official: Team M.E.A.N. (Marquette Engineers and Nurses) is the new champion of the Fall 2004 Co-Ed Softball B League. "Why do I care?" you might be asking yourself right now. The answer is you don't. You most likely don't even know me and you're only coming here to be amused. So if that's what you want, then I will simply answer your questions.
YOU: So, yeah. Why do I care?
Flametroll: Because it was epic softball play that can be seen as a symbol of life itself. M.E.A.N. was a team that was thrown together from a group of freshmen who barely knew each other. From mere acquaintances it became a cohesive team that outlasted the more seasoned opposition. In fact, all of the opposing teams were covered in much more garlic than any M.E.A.N. player ever was.
Although its record was a mere 2-3, M.E.A.N. came back against all odds. It was a team that (due to bracket oddities) had to win three games to become champions rather than the 1 or 2 wins the other teams needed. Most of all it was a team that got its collective backside out of bed every Sunday morning to make eleven o'clock or noon game time. This turned out to be the decisive factor.
Y: Why?
FT:Because the teams M.E.A.N. was supposed to play in the semi-finals and finals both forfeited because their players failed to show up.
Y: What a bunch of losers!
FT: That's what we think too. Although we would never say so.
Y: You that this applies to life itself. What was that supposed to mean?
FT: I never said that.
Y: Yes, you did.
FT: Did not.
Y: Did too.
FT: Oh yeah, I did. But I didn't mean it.
Y: Are you looking for a way out of debt?
FT: Leave me alone.
Y: But I swear I can get you some V1a:graa! or Ci@lis reeel cheep!
YOU: So, yeah. Why do I care?
Flametroll: Because it was epic softball play that can be seen as a symbol of life itself. M.E.A.N. was a team that was thrown together from a group of freshmen who barely knew each other. From mere acquaintances it became a cohesive team that outlasted the more seasoned opposition. In fact, all of the opposing teams were covered in much more garlic than any M.E.A.N. player ever was.
Although its record was a mere 2-3, M.E.A.N. came back against all odds. It was a team that (due to bracket oddities) had to win three games to become champions rather than the 1 or 2 wins the other teams needed. Most of all it was a team that got its collective backside out of bed every Sunday morning to make eleven o'clock or noon game time. This turned out to be the decisive factor.
Y: Why?
FT:Because the teams M.E.A.N. was supposed to play in the semi-finals and finals both forfeited because their players failed to show up.
Y: What a bunch of losers!
FT: That's what we think too. Although we would never say so.
Y: You that this applies to life itself. What was that supposed to mean?
FT: I never said that.
Y: Yes, you did.
FT: Did not.
Y: Did too.
FT: Oh yeah, I did. But I didn't mean it.
Y: Are you looking for a way out of debt?
FT: Leave me alone.
Y: But I swear I can get you some V1a:graa! or Ci@lis reeel cheep!
Poll Result Source
In an earlier post, I promised to keep my loyal reader(s) updated on presidential poll results. They seem to jump all over the place remarkably considering everybody says only 5-10% percent of the electorate is undecided. Well, let your heart not be troubled! I have found a website that updates major poll sources as they report their numbers. That sentence didn't really make much sense, but I think you know what I mean. It's PollingReport.com.
As of this post (October 16 at 3:35 pm CST):
Newsweek-> Bush 50 - Kerry 44%
Zogby-> Bush 48 - Kerry 44%
Newsweek-> Bush 50 - Kerry 44%
Tipp-> Bush 48 - Kerry 45%
ABC-> Bush 48 - Kerry 48%
Washington Post-> Bush 48 - Kerry 48%
GQRR-> Bush 48 - Kerry 48%
CBS-> Bush 48 - Kerry 45%
ICR-> Bush 48 - Kerry 43%
Gallup-> Kerry 49 - Bush 48%
As of this post (October 16 at 3:35 pm CST):
Newsweek-> Bush 50 - Kerry 44%
Zogby-> Bush 48 - Kerry 44%
Newsweek-> Bush 50 - Kerry 44%
Tipp-> Bush 48 - Kerry 45%
ABC-> Bush 48 - Kerry 48%
Washington Post-> Bush 48 - Kerry 48%
GQRR-> Bush 48 - Kerry 48%
CBS-> Bush 48 - Kerry 45%
ICR-> Bush 48 - Kerry 43%
Gallup-> Kerry 49 - Bush 48%
Eat It, Roger Clemens!
As I was typing another post, Larry Walker nailed a homerun off of future Hall of Famer Roger Clemens. Just thought y'all might like to know.
Bloom on, sweet opiates of liberty! Bloom on!
I have found a new blog to amuse myself with. Just when I thought the whole blogosphere was a pile of pinko commies dumping on George Bush (with a few right wing nutjobs mixed in), I found fafblog. I can't say I understand, but why should that stop me? It doesn't keep me from appreciating the theory of relativity or Coldplay's lyrics or people from the south.
Sure, it's fairly liberal, but read the post called "Faf the Vote." Where does that stuff come from?
Sure, it's fairly liberal, but read the post called "Faf the Vote." Where does that stuff come from?
Check Local Listings
I'm not sure if it made ESPN or not, but I was a basketball star here at Marquette. We (those of us who "are Marquette") were celebrating Midnight Madness last night. It was the first time that NCAA rules allowed the basketball team to practice together officially, so they started right at midnight to avoid losing precious practice time. Marquette put on a party around the big day by introducing the players, having a 3-on-3 tournament and bringing in a cover band that played too much Maroon 5. They also brought some students down from the stands to take part in a shooting contest on the floor.
There were six people playing Hot Shot, three on a team. Each person had 30 seconds to go out and make as many shots as possible from one of several marked spots on the floor. Somehow, I got chosen. Less surprisingly, my team won. I say this not because I'm an arrogant jerk (I admit I'm not very good at basketball), but because--as far as I could tell--our team had the only two sober guys on it. As a prize, I won a Pizza Shuttle gift certificate and another gift certificate for BookMarq. I also got a cheering section for a short period of time. That was nice, too.
There were six people playing Hot Shot, three on a team. Each person had 30 seconds to go out and make as many shots as possible from one of several marked spots on the floor. Somehow, I got chosen. Less surprisingly, my team won. I say this not because I'm an arrogant jerk (I admit I'm not very good at basketball), but because--as far as I could tell--our team had the only two sober guys on it. As a prize, I won a Pizza Shuttle gift certificate and another gift certificate for BookMarq. I also got a cheering section for a short period of time. That was nice, too.
Margin of Error
In an attempt to make some sense of poll numbers that show Kerry up 5, then Bush up 10, then dead heat, then…blahblahblah, I am going to record evry poll result I come across right here.
Reuters-Zogby->Kerry 45%-Bush45% (+- 2.9)
CNN/USA Today/Gallup-> Kerry 49%- Bush 48% (+- 3.5)
Reuters-Zogby->Kerry 45%-Bush45% (+- 2.9)
CNN/USA Today/Gallup-> Kerry 49%- Bush 48% (+- 3.5)
Duh of the Day
Instructions in a Marquette University safety brochure (emphasis mine):
"Tell the caller that the call is being traced, press several numbers on the phone and hang up. Please note that technique is intended to scare the caller and does not actually begin a tracing procedure."
"Tell the caller that the call is being traced, press several numbers on the phone and hang up. Please note that technique is intended to scare the caller and does not actually begin a tracing procedure."
Next Item-the Locks
I got home from only five weeks away at college and discovered that there have already been a few changes around here. Some of them are fairly minor-a new soap dispenser in the bathroom, a new phone in the kitchen. A few of them, though, have been more drastic and disconcerting. My car, for example, not longer has my presets on the radio. I used to have FM1 settings and my sister had FM2. Now, her stations have flooded over into both FM sets. Also, my San Damiano cross hanging from the rearview morror has been replaced by a lei. The St. Louis Cardinals air freshener is now a strawberry. I'm scared to leave and come back again. I may not have a room next time.
What Would This Site Be Without Weird Links?
Like this.
I love this prayer. It sounds like something from Braveheart.
A Warrior's Prayer
Great Creator God, who rules the world in glory and honor, I regret my dishonor and am ashamed of the honors I have not won. My sins are great and noisome, unbefitting a warrior, and they have brought me no glory and no honor, but only the taste of ashes. I am leaderless and lost without a foe. Your brave death was bought with great pain, and it was glorious,
for in that death upon the cross, you defeated death, sin and Satan. Lord God, I accept your atoning death as the sacrifice which covers my sin and shame. Enter into this warrior's heart and become emperor of my life. I trust in you my commander and willingly follow you into battle. Direct me now in my deeds so that I may be worthy of the honor you have bought for me!
Qapla'!
I love this prayer. It sounds like something from Braveheart.
Great Creator God, who rules the world in glory and honor, I regret my dishonor and am ashamed of the honors I have not won. My sins are great and noisome, unbefitting a warrior, and they have brought me no glory and no honor, but only the taste of ashes. I am leaderless and lost without a foe. Your brave death was bought with great pain, and it was glorious,
for in that death upon the cross, you defeated death, sin and Satan. Lord God, I accept your atoning death as the sacrifice which covers my sin and shame. Enter into this warrior's heart and become emperor of my life. I trust in you my commander and willingly follow you into battle. Direct me now in my deeds so that I may be worthy of the honor you have bought for me!
Qapla'!
