Watching the RNC

I know, liveblogging political events is not The Flametroll Way to Be©. I'll post something about monkeys soon, no doubt.

I caught the tail end of Giuliani's speech. I don't really like him very much, so I was drifting in and out. I did catch a phrase about McCain fighting for "freedom here and abroad." Giuliani didn't mention how lucky he has been to have enjoyed freedom here and three broads. He also paused awkwardly for cheers, leaving the audience wondering what to do for a couple of seconds before they realized that he was waiting on them.

Sarah Palin's speech was pretty good. The attacks seemed little forced, I thought. Maybe being harsh doesn't come naturally, I don't know. My main complaint was that she gave her kids ridiculous names: Track, Bristol, Willow, Piper and Trig. Three Four All of those are admissible in a game of Scrabble. (EDIT: Apparently "Bristol" is a "a smooth cardboard." "Trig" as an adjective means "neat" and as a verb means "to make trig." Enlightening.) I'm sure those kids are perfectly happy with their names--and it's no skin off my nose if they are. But seriously, those are not real names.

*The Scrabble rule of names (which occurred to me just now) states that any non-nickname (ie, Bob, Sue, Rich) which is longer than three letters long and is admissible in a game of Scrabble is not a suitable name for a child. I'm talking to you, people who name your kids Hunter, Rivers, Apple and Tanner.

Addendum 1: Theological Virtues and Gifts or Fruits of the Holy Spirit are grudgingly accepted. Hope and Faith, we'll let you two slide. But only if the parents have had so many kids that they're out of real names.

Addendum 2: Last names of all former American Presidents are off-limits. That means no Madisons, no Lincolns, no Taylors. Sorry, the almanac is not a baby names book.

1 comments on this foolish article:

Diesel said...

Those names sound like the names that Atticus Finch would have given his next five kids.